Today’s post is from my husband, David Weatherly. I’ll be sharing my perspective next week.
David: I just got Mr. Mirenzi-ed.
Courtney: What? What does that even mean?
David: I was picking up your prescription and the guy at CVS kept calling me Mr. Mirenzi since I said I was picking up the prescription for my wife.
Courtney: Well, how did that feel?
David: Weird. I dunno. I felt like somehow he was subverting my identity.
Courtney: That’s interesting. You should write about that.
The first thing I thought when the pharmacist called me Mr. Mirenzi was, “That’s incorrect.” Since it was the first time it happened, I was a little thrown off. By the time I thought to say, “No I’m Mr. Weatherly,” it was already too late. It took me a while to run through different fake conservations in my head to figure out what my response should be. I must have looked like a space cadet as I carried on a mostly monosyllabic real conversation with him involving lots of “Yes’s” and “Um-um’s.” I figured my options were the following:
A) Jesse Pinkman style – “Yo, my name is Mr. Weatherly. Get it right . . . bitch.”
B) Overly gregarious Southern style – “I hate to interrupt, but I just wanted to point out my name is actually Mr. Weatherly. And you know it’s funny, we got married over two years ago, and this is the f1irst time this is happened. That reminds me of our wedding. It really was quite lovely. We had it at my wife’s family house, and it couldn’t have been more perfect. Guess how long our ceremony was? No, really, just guess! Only 3.5 minutes! Isn’t that crazy? Let me tell you . . . (10 minutes later) . . . Did you know Weatherly is actually a nautical term?”
C) Silence style – ” . . . ”
I went for option C. After doing the mental calculus of how much trouble it would be to explain the situation, I just realized it was easier to have him keep calling me Mr. Mirenzi. All things being equal, the path of least resistance usually wins.
When were getting married, I always thought it as Courtney’s choice of what she wanted to do with her name, but I never really considered the reverse. What if people just expected me to change my name? My family has been in the US since the 1690s. I constantly make references like “That’s a very Weatherly way to look at it.”
My name is a part of me. It tells my history and carries my heritage. I like how it sounds slightly aristocratic, and I like how it’s actually a nautical term. Able to sail close to the wind with little drift. Which describes me pretty well, I pick a direction and sail straight.
As a man, I would never even consider giving up my name. For women, I can’t imagine what it feels like to have to make that choice. The important thing to me is that it should be a choice, and call me new fashioned, but I like being Mr. Weatherly married to Ms. Mirenzi.